Had an audition for a short film today. Had to play a bitch (keep your comments to yourself please). You know you give it your all, but the truth of the matter is that I leave that audition room plagued by doubts no matter how I did. Sometimes, if I did really bad I can let it go easier than if I did okay but not great.
Because if I stank, well that's that. It's over and there's no way I got it. But if I did okay, but not great, then the things I could've done differently plague me because I was "So Close."
"So Close" is the bane of an actor's existence, because it's the staus quo of our lives. "You were this close." "It was down to you and someone else." "You were almost exactly what we were looking for" - I love that one especially since it reduces you to an object.
So today, I did okay - not great. I could've done better if...